Others have told me that I seem to be a confident person – and all I can think of when I hear this is: Really? Seriously?
I spent a lot of my life trying to achieve goals, choosing a course of action and going after it with all my gusto. Sometimes I would actually create an action plan, other times, I wouldn’t even think things through and just barrel on in. And, nearly every time I was wrong, disappointed, frustrated, and usually humbled. So, I am certain when I say that throughout my life pretty much each and every time I tried to accomplish anything under my own power, my attempts were foiled.
And, that’s a good thing. God’s had His eye on me ever since I was born, and God has made sure that I knew that I needed to rely on Him for all the goodness in my life. I am sure that was God telling me, time and time again through my failures – and reinforcing the lesson – that under my own power I am unable to bring about the things that I want to happen. Because, it’s not the things that I want to happen that matters, it’s the things that God wants accomplished that really matters. He knows of my heart to walk with Him step-by-step each and everyday. And when I get out of step, He turns me back around and points me towards Himself.
I should have learned the lesson earlier. And, at times, I still forget the lesson when I barge ahead to “help” God with my plan – the plan that I wrongly ascribe as coming from Him.
I am thankful for my failures, I am thankful for the times I have been wrong, I am thankful for God keeping me humble. I am thankful that God thinks enough of me as His child to not let me succeed in anything that does not follow His plan, or His purpose in my life. All because He loves me that much.
Dear Lord, thank you for the times in my life in which you’ve sheltered me, saved me, and turned me around from the things of this world. Thank you those times that have humbled me. Thank you for reminding me that without you I cannot accomplish your purpose. Let me always remember that the only confidence that I can have in this life is when I am in lock-step with you, and when you are working through me.
I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. (John 15:5, ESV)