I believe that we all have experiences in our lives that are of such devastating consequences that when I say the words broken places your mind immediately goes to that hurtful experience. Some of us, perhaps many of us, have more than one “broken place” experience in our past.
It’s a past experience that can bring tears right to our eyes just thinking about it. Or, it can bring shame. Or, it can bring about condemnation in our minds. Or, it can send you into a very bad mood. Or, just thinking about it can take your breath away. Or, it can send you right to your knees.
I contend that even if you’ve released the experience, and forgiven the perpetrator, you’ll still view the experience with some sort of negative connotation. My mind flits to several such experiences for which I feel some of those feelings that I mentioned above.
But today God laid a particular experience on my heart and I’m getting a new understanding, I am seeing my part in that experience in a new light, and today I’ve put a new label for my part of that experience.. There once was a person in my life with whom I experienced immense strife. So much so, that while in the situation, I truly endangered my Christian witness and severely strained my communion with God. I was so wrapped up in the situation that I gave the enemy the foothold that he needed, and that foothold grew into a mighty, impassible mountain so high, so wide, and so heavy that I felt that I could never get through this experience. I was trapped, and I needed rescue. And, like a desperate, caged animal I reacted. With hatred. I struck back, and I wounded the other party when I could. I justified my actions by saying that I was merely reflecting back to that person just what they were sending my way.
Hatred is very dangerous. Hate will consume you, it will take every ounce of your energy, and drain you of hope. Hate will destroy you. Hate does not come from God.
“Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness. Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling. But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes. (1 John 2:9-11, ESV)
Father God, today I come to you to confess something that you’ve known all along, I have hated someone who is also precious in your sight. I was consumed with bitter anguish over our relationship. I struck out against this person. Thank you for showing me just what truly was in my heart during that experience. For those thoughts and actions on my part, I am truly sorry. Thank you for always forgiving me my sins and restoring me into a right relationship with you Lord.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9, ESV)